Mancat Monday

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Hi everyone ! I thought I would do a Mancat Monday with a Brody update.

Brody A lot of times, he can be spotted peaking from the top of the steps.

He basically lives in the upstairs bathroom which is quite small. I open the door every morning and close it before bed.  Throughout the day, he will venture down and try to befriend the others only to be met with hisses. Last week, my hubby claims that Brody attacked his princess, Prancie. He squirted him with the spray bottle and he came right back after her. I honestly think he was attempting to play. Unfortunately, now the hubby doesn’t like him. Spooky had hissed at him about 2 weeks before he left us. My hubby is taking Spooky’s passing very hard and I think he feels like he would be betraying Spooky to make friends with Brody. I mentioned that and he said he just doesn’t like that cat.( No worries, Brody is here to stay so they will have to coexist).

brodyandmillie   Brody and Millie visit each other through the screen door a lot. I am afraid to let them be together though because Millie likes to attack and I don’t want him to teach bad things to Brody.

Brody is braver with me and will eat in front of me. For several weeks, he wouldn’t even look at the food if I was there. When he is downstairs though, he runs the minute I move at all. I am wondering if I should just keep being patient and  hoping things will work out or if I should crate him ( I have a large crate with plenty of room for a litter box). I would keep him in the living room and hopefully the others would get used to him and accept him. I appreciate any advice. Thank you.

I also bought a Feliway diffuser for multi-cat homes. I probably need about 5, but I got one for the living room to start. The vet assured me they are better and don’t get as hot  (I tossed my last one because I was afraid of a fire). Brody3Isn’t he a cutie?

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82 comments

  3. I am recommending patience. I know we both want things to move along faster. It’s good you see Brody. MerryBelle is most active when I’m not around – I still only see her in a blur out of the corner of my eye. I talk to her all the time but she doesn’t talk back. I want to force her to be around me but I am making myself opt for patience. I think if we don’t push the scared kitties into being with us, it will be less traumatizing for them in the long run. Hang in there !!

  4. It will take a good while for Brody to fit in.
    Baby steps.
    We send purrs for all to be well.

    Purrs Georgia and Julie,
    Treasure and JJ

  5. Oh poor Brody…..getting a bad rap for trying to make friends with some of you kitties there! Brody is a handsome boy and after growing up as a feral probably is having quite a tough time getting used to so many NEW things being an inside kitty. He might be even more scared in a crate with the others around – may feel a bit too vulnerable for comfort BUT we really don’t know much about life in a many-cat household! We will be happy when we hear that your Dad has accepted him for what he is though – a kitty who needed a home and was lucky enough to find one there with all of you!!!!! Sending special hugs to him……………and your Mom for helping him.

    Love, Sammy

    1. Thank you for your words of encouragement. XO and love to you and your Mom

  7. I think your current method of giving it time and patience is great. It may take even more time and patience, and lots of it, but you’re already seeing impressive signs of Brody venturing out and about. I might be hesitant to put him in a play pen with all of the others around, as that might be too big of a change to his current level of comfort, and I’m just afraid that would take the current progress a few steps back. Maybe down the line, when he shows even more comfort and willingness to expand his surroundings, you could consider relocating his hub to somewhere closer to the rest of the family.

    Honestly, Ellen, you are doing great with Brody! Transitioning a previously feral cat into a house kitty is no small feat, but you’re doing great so far.

    I feel for both you and your husband with the loss of your beloved Spooky. I hope you both can find peace and comfort in the memories you have of him. Hugs and prayers to you!

    1. Thank you, you are very sweet. I am going to just be patient, as long as he is eating and seems OK.

  8. I think Brody is making good progress, so IMO keep doing what you’re doing. I was going to suggest a Feliway diffuser so I’m glad you have one of those. You may want to add one to the bathroom Brody stays in. Have you tried Rescue Remedy?

    1. Thank you, I haven’t tried Rescue Remedy, I should get that too.

  9. Brody will be hubbies pal at some point. Patience. It just takes time.

    Spooky will always leave a hole in your heart. I’ve so many holes over the years, but I would trade a one of those precious babies to get rid of the hole.

    I linked you to Awww Mondays. ☺

    1. I feel the same way, getting to share a life with them is worth the pain. thank you for linking my Awww Monday 🙂

  11. I’ve read that rubbing a cloth on each cat, then rubbing the others with it can help (a trick for when one cat goes to the vet, then gets hissed at by resident cats). However, I do not have any practical advice, since my one attempt at integrating a new cat into the home failed. I want to you succeed, Ellen, so I’m sending warm thoughts and purrs!

    1. I would love to try that, but Brody is not going to let me rub him with a cloth. Thank you XO

      1. After a week of mulling this over – you may be able to accomplish something similar without touching anyone – just lay an old soft cloth in Brody’s area and another in the area the others frequent. Then after a couple of days, swap them around. Even if Brody doesn’t sleep on the cloth, his scent in an enclosed area will still be there, and vice versa. Just a thought.

        1. Thank you. That is a great idea, I am going to try that. I just hope no one decides to pee on the cloths 🙂

          1. Even if they do, make sure they are old raggy things that can be thrown in the wash or even pitched. Maybe something with your scent too.

          2. Good thinking 🙂 I did give Brody something with my scent a while ago and he won’t use it 🙂

  12. Brody is adorable!
    Purrseidon was crated when she initially joined our family… actually crate trained her, much like a dog. Come to think of it, perhaps I shouldn’t be so surprised that her best play furiend is a Husky, she acts a lot like a puppy and even likes going on adventures including swimming…. Can crate training do that?!?!?!

  14. I think you are very experienced with kitties, so I am sure Brodie will settle down in his own good time!! He seems to be progressing well!

  15. I hope that Brody makes peace with your husband and the other cats. Perhaps putting him in the crate around the others will help. He is handsome. Best of luck. ♥

    1. I may do that, but I will give him a little more time. Thank you.

  16. It will probably take everyone a while to get used to one another. Go slow with introductions so every kitty feels safe. I hope that they will accept Brody in time. <3

  17. dood…..ewe R inn deed most handsum…..we R hopin with all hopes N then sum, that stuffs terns round for ewe, & yur familee veree soon….ewe noe everee one still haz de sadz over lucy, stinky & spooky, & itz gonna take a few for em ta get bak in de “swing” oh stuff…ya noe…. give it time & bee fore long everee one will be yur pal 🙂 ♥♥♥

  21. I would avoid the crate for now. The fact that he wants to be with the other kitties a bit is a good sign.I think he has come a long way already. I know how hard it is to be patient, but I am afraid the crate, even a large one,would just freak him out at this point.( If you were underwater in a shark cage and knew its purpose you might not be scared when the sharks come around,but I don’t think a former feral would understand that yet. If only we could explain to them !) The gray kitty I spoke about before is still coming around but he is not letting me see him (it was an accident of timing this morning !)There is also a black cat coming around. My 4 outdoor cats do alot of sniffing, they share the front porch resting places – or, rather, rotate through them. So they seem to tolerate one another, but the ferals want nothing to do with me. It worries me to not even see them for several days. That’s why I say just be patient – he is doing so well and is safe and loved !

    1. I hope your gray kitty and black one get braver too. You are right that I should avoid the crate. He is doing better, just taking longer than I had hoped.

  22. Aaaaaaaaw Sweet Brody, he’s so cute. Mommy says everypawdy’s gonna tell you to be patient and wait it out. And who knows, they may be right. We don’t have da space fur patience and so mommy always insist on pushin’ da point and makin’ everypawdy get along. And of course dat works fur her. But she says there’s more to it than just hopin’ fur da bestest. You have to have da right mind set and “believe” it’s gonna work out. She says dat’s where lots of peeps fail our method. We’s sendin’ purrayers.

    Luv ya’

    Dezi

  25. I would not push anything and not confine him to a crate. Time and patience and then more patience. Hubby will hopefully calm down, so sorry on that front. Brodie seems to be doing much better. I see even with little Bree here that if I try to push anything with her even after 6 months (and she is a puppymill pup) she gets highly stressed. Knowing how much more sensitive cats are, as I had Alyce and was ever slowly trying to help her adjust before I lost her, I would not stress if I was you and would just use the tincture of time.

    1. Thank you for the encouragement. I am sorry you lost Alyce before she learned to trust. XO

  26. As hard as it may be, you should continue to be patient with Brody. It takes some cats longer than others. I’ve had Zoey here for 8 years and she still isn’t totally comfortable in the house. And I’ve tried everything. She and Wally do not get along, and she and Ernie have a tenuous relationship at best. She does best in her own room. Hopefully, Brody will come around. ~Island Cat Mom

    1. Zoey sounds like my KaTwo- she has her own room. I am running out of rooms though.

  27. We hope Brody gets some forgiveness and patience. It must be hard stayin in a small room all day an night. Heck, we might whap someone too if we werent getting love and freedom…

    1. He is free all day, it is just at night he is locked up. I may “forget” some night and see what happens.

  28. Good luck with Brody. I think TW felt the same way about me when I first came here cos she loved Nicky so much. Now we are bonded for life.

    1. I am glad TW bonded with you, I hope my hubby does the same with Brody.

  29. Brody is very handsome! We hope he is able to make friends with everykitty soon. We’re sending purrs for everykitty to get along!

  30. You have quite a large kitty family and it will take time to integrate Brody. Hopefully the Feliway will help calm everyone down and you’ll have peaceful coexistance

  31. Well most older cats don’t take well when a newer cat comes along. Hopefully, Brody gets accepted into the cat clique at home 🙂

  32. Happy yo hear this about the Feliway diffusers. I may try one again. I used to have three, but I too was worried about fire. Some got so hot, they put out smoke. I think I would keep the status quo with Brody for now. I think a crate could be a step backward. I find the calming collars work well. I have a lot less hissing and chasing when the kitties are wearing them. Most behaviorist discourage the use of water spray bottles. We have used this method in the past, but it is said that it is only a temporary fix as the cats do not “learn” from its use. Good luck, Ellen. I am so happy that Brody is staying put.

    1. Thank you, I know spray bottles are not the best idea, but it can break up a fight pretty fast. I am pleased with the diffuser, my vet had a $5 coupon, you should ask if yours does.

  33. Hi Ellen,
    At PAWS we had a lot of success using the directions from Best Friends.
    The cats we worked with had to be crated. If they were loose, they would be able to avoid us, and there was a lot of brushing and hand feeding involved. You can read their directions if you want to try it. http://bestfriends.org/resources/socializing-cats-how-socialize-very-shy-or-fearful-cat
    Brody is a beauty. Hope he learns to get along with your family!
    xxoo

    1. Thank you for these directions, I will check them out and try them. He does a great job of avoiding me.

  34. Oh Ellen Brody reminds me of a feral I used to feed called Rocco Fellini!!
    he had this serious gangster thing going on & had such swagger. Maybe he & Brody are distant cousins, hahahaha……
    I am sorry the other cats are not enthused about Brody……I have no brilliant ideas to share. And as for the Feliway I am not as impressed with it as I was in the beginning. Siddhartha Henry is still acting out a lot. And you are right the Diffuse gets VERY hot & that makes me nervous too!
    Back to Brody; maybe he will just be an ‘upstairs’ cat like Precious is @ Brian’s Home????
    (((hugs))) Sherri-Ellen

    1. I hope Brody can join the mix, I have 3 in a room upstairs, they do come out, but not all the time and KaTwo has her own room next to our bedroom. You should contact Feliway, maybe they will send you the improved one. I am sorry Siddhartha is still being naughty- maybe the spring air is exciting him. I know my cats have been more “playful”.XO and love

      1. There is an improved Feliway?? I did not know this!
        Siddhartha Henry has calmed down a lot with my trouble & Hospital visit. And Bach’s, lol……

        1. Yes, this is one for multi-cat homes. I bet it would be good for you too my sweet boy. XO

  35. Poor Brody. We think it will just take lots of patience. Being comfortable and accepted will have to be on his terms and in his own time. We’re purring and praying!

  36. I tried ‘forcing’ a non feral 7 year old kitty into our furmily…and he was the only kitty then(!), and it was not good thing to do…he just needed to be intrgrsted on his own time in his own way…and he did.

    We are so sorry that Hubby thinks Brody is trying to steal the place of Spooky…but Brody doesn’t know much about Spooky, so that just is Hubby’s grief still needing some time to heal. We think its great that Brody tried to come and see Hubby, but its too bad the timing was not so good when there was some whapping. Eventually we hope that will change.

    (Pipo still whaps dog-guy even after being here over 11 years, MOL!)

    Try leaving the door to his room ajar at night, or put up a baby gate instead of the closed door.

    Best wishes and stay patient, it seems you are doing the right things. Brody just wants to learn abut this new den he has in his own way on his own terms.

    ((((( ♥ )))))

    1. Thank you for the encouragement. I had one of those cheap screen doors that you can supposedly put anywhere and he got through that his first night upstairs. I agree that he needs to do it his way so I will have to wait. XO

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